Category Archives: Christianity

July 10, 2022 · 1:00 am

PTSD and Grief – Healing Through Nature

File:Early Fall in Sierra Nevada Range, CA 9-16 (29957191822).jpg

Early Autumn in the Sierra Nevada, Author Don Graham of Redlands, CA (CC BY-SA 2.0 Generic)

“Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul alike.”

– John Muir

The respected naturalist and environmental philosopher, John Muir, believed that nature offers the body and mind opportunities to heal themselves [1].

Muir tirelessly hiked the Sierra Nevada, writing extensively about his experiences and ultimately co-founding America’s premier conservation organization, the Sierra Club.  His activism helped to preserve both Yosemite and Sequoia National Parks.

Mission Outdoors https://missionoutdoors.org/ and Hometown Hero Outdoors https://hometownherooutdoors.org/ are two small non-profits which share Muir’s view.

They afford military service members and veterans a temporary escape from the stress of combat or the difficulties of transitioning to civilian life through hunting, fishing, and other outdoor activities.  Hometown Hero Outdoors is open to law enforcement personnel, as well.

PTSD

Many of these individuals suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder – an illness to which victims of childhood abuse and domestic abuse are, also, prone. Continue reading →

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June 12, 2022 · 1:00 am

“When Children Aren’t Allowed to Say No” by Cynthia Bailey-Rug

Narcissistic Personality Disorder - Causes, Symptoms, Complications, Diagnosis, Treatment

“Narcissistic parents are notorious for not allowing their children to have any boundaries. They have no problem going through their children’s personal belongings or even breaking or getting rid of things their child uses or loves. Children are allowed no privacy, & some narcissistic parents go as far as removing their bedroom doors. Possibly the worst thing narcissistic parents do is refusing to allow their children to say “no”.

Narcissistic parents are too self centered to realize or even care that by not allowing their children to say no, they are teaching their children some pretty terrible lessons. When children learn that saying no is bad & not allowed, this teaches them that others can treat them however they wish. This opens the door for other wicked people to abuse these children. It also sets these children up for a life of misery because they don’t believe they have the right to say no to anyone, no matter what. They also believe that they have to say yes to everyone & everything, & that obviously is a huge problem!…” [Continued at https://cynthiabaileyrug.wordpress.com/2022/05/26/when-children-arent-allowed-to-say-no/ ]

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: https://alawyersprayers.com

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June 5, 2022 · 1:00 am

Mea Culpa

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/cc/Southern_Baptist_Convention_logo.png

Guidepost Solutions has issued a scathing report accusing leaders of the Southern Baptist Convention, America’s largest Protestant denomination, of routinely stonewalling claims of clergy abuse for the past two decades [1].

Convicted child molesters were allowed to continue in ministry without warning to their current congregations across multiple states.

This revelation is akin to the Catholic Church sex scandal in severity.  It confirms that pride and sexual sin are not limited to a single denomination (or linked to a vow of chastity). Continue reading →

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May 15, 2022 · 1:00 am

“A Mother’s Love” by Kelly Fratamico

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/68/Mary_Cassatt_-_Mother_and_Child_%28The_Goodnight_Hug%29.jpg

“Mother and Child (A Goodnight Hug)” (1880) by Mary Cassatt, Source https://www.wikiart.org/en/mary-cassatt/mother-and-child-1880 (PD)

Readers of my other blog A Lawyer’s Prayers will be familiar with Christian Legal Clinics of Philadelphia https://www.clcphila.org/, a non-profit whose predecessor I had the opportunity of co-founding.

Through the efforts of volunteer Christian attorneys and paralegals, CLCP provides the poor of Philadelphia with legal services at no charge.

This is one story [1]:

“In 2016 Maria, a native of the Dominican Republic, sent her two young sons, to live with their father in the US.  She could not afford to come with them, so stayed behind…Maria made this sacrifice so her sons could receive a better education and not be influenced by violence in their town.

Maria was finally able to join her sons and their father in the United States…in the summer of 2021.  However, their father became abusive with Maria and tried to keep the boys from her.  With the help of the police and her sister, she was able to retrieve her sons and move into a place of her own.  However, Maria…was scared that he would use the court system to take  her sons from her.” Continue reading →

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May 8, 2022 · 12:00 am

Reliving Trauma, Part 2

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/fb/Spaghetti_%26_Meatballs_%284%29_%2838218925246%29.jpgSpaghetti and Meatballs, Author John Freeman
(CC Attribution-2.0 Generic)

The Weight-Loss Battle

Again and again, you resolve to lose weight.  At times, you make heroic efforts in this direction.  You try fad diets, and supervised weight loss programs.  You try home exercise equipment and gym memberships.  You fast, may occasionally purge.

And you do lose weight, sometimes substantial amounts.  But as soon as you have acquired an attractive wardrobe in a smaller size, your weight shoots up again.  It is as if you were fighting a force outside yourself.

The pain of this is excruciating.  Giving away – one after another – the pretty items of clothing that no longer fit, you feel as if the flesh were being ripped from your bones, piece by piece.

This happens time after time, over the years, stripping you of hope.

Self-Control and a Negative Inner Dialog

Disciplined in other areas of life, you revile yourself for a lack of self-control where food is concerned, further contributing to an inner dialog which is already wholly negative.

You do your best to live a life of integrity.  But nothing you accomplish has value in your eyes, so long as you continue to have weight issues.

Scalding encounters with those who make clear their disgust at your appearance only reinforce your sense of worthlessness.

Weight Issues/Eating Disorders as a Substitute

Weight problems and eating disorders (anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, etc.) can arise from other causes than abuse [1].  But when abuse of some kind has occurred, they frequently serve as substitutes – an alternate focus for our shame, safer places to put our pain.

We may agonize over the difficulty of losing weight.  But, chances are, that is preferable to agonizing over the incest to which we were subjected.  The difficulty of the struggle reflects the depth of the wound. Continue reading →

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April 17, 2022 · 1:00 am

To Believe


TO BELIEVE
Lyrics by Matt Evancho

“Before I lay me down to rest
I ask the Lord one small request
I know I have all I could need
But this prayer is not for me

Too many people on this day
Don’t have a peaceful place to stay
Let all fighting cease that your children may see peace
Wipe their tears of sorrow away

To believe in a day
When hunger and war will pass away
To have the hope amidst despair
That every sparrow’s counted
That you hear each cry and listen to each prayer

Let me try always to believe
That we can hear the hearts that grieve
Please help us not ignore
The anguished cries of the poor
Or their pain will never leave

To believe in a day
When hunger and war will pass away
To have the hope amidst despair
That every sparrow’s counted
That you hear their cries and listen to each prayer

Father, as you see, I’m just a child
And there’s so much to understand
But if Your Grace should surround me
Then I’ll do the best I can
I promise, I’ll do the very best I can

To believe in a day
When hunger and war will pass away
To have the hope amidst despair
That every sparrow’s counted
That you hear each cry and listen to each prayer
(Hear each cry and listen to each prayer)

Help us do Your will our Father
In the name of all that’s true
And we’ll see in one another
The loving image of You”

Wishing you all a blessed Easter!

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: https://alawyersprayers.com

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April 10, 2022 · 1:00 am

Discernment, Intergenerational Trauma, and a Red Panda

Turning Red Trailer, Poster and Images Revealed by Disney and Pixar

There is a heated debate surrounding Disney Pixar’s latest animated feature Turning Red, a cartoon about a 13 y.o. girl who magically transforms into a red panda [1A].

Many critics have praised the film, calling it a celebration of teen girls [1B].  Others view it as a narrative on intergenerational trauma [1C].  Still others see the film as demonic [2].

Plot Line of Turning Red

Mei’s mother expects her to work in the family temple which honors the red panda.  With puberty, Mei begins turning into a red panda, herself, whenever she experiences strong emotion.  She learns this problem has plagued the family for generations.  According to Mei’s mother, the cure is a ritual which buries happiness and passion, along with anger and fear.

Intergenerational Trauma

Intergenerational trauma is a concept used to explain how the traumatic effects of a historical event may be passed from one generation to the next [3][4].

Despite having survived a Nazi concentration camp, a grandmother who coped there by repressing her emotions may remain distant from her family for decades afterwards.  This will impact not only her children, but their children, and so on.  Generations of denial, emotional distance, and defensive behavior can result.

Intergenerational trauma is associated with rape, sexual abuse, murder and other forms of severe trauma.  It can be passed on even if the trauma is never identified by name or discussed with family members. Continue reading →

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April 3, 2022 · 1:00 am

Fire Shut Up in My Bones

“…you may try your best to repress a truth, but you cannot because it hurts!  It’s literally painful.  And until you release it, it will feel like a fire shut up in my [your] bones.”

-Charles M. Blow, Author of Fire Shut Up in My Bones

Tickets are sold out to jazz great Terence Blanchard’s [1] “Fire Shut Up in My Bones” [2], the first opera by a black composer to be featured at New York City’s prestigious Metropolitan Opera.

This is not “Oklahoma!”.  There are no songs here that will become popular hits, later sung by schoolchildren.  The music is instead somber, in a minor key.  The story is powerful and moving – a coming of age story set in the Deep South; a story of sexual abuse and resilience.

That story is based on the autobiographical memoir [3][4][5] of New York Times op-ed columnist Charles M. Blow [6]. Continue reading →

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March 27, 2022 · 1:00 am

Evil Never Rests

Evil eyes Royalty Free Vector Image - VectorStock

The past two years have been eventful for the world.  First, Covid dominated the news. Now, the tragic war in Ukraine (with 115 children killed, 140 injured, an untold number orphaned, and 1.5 million made refugees) is a major focus [1][2].

The following events have, also, taken place. They demonstrate that evil never rests:

  • Incest — Gucci heiress, Alexandra Zarini, has alleged that her stepfather, Joseph Ruffalo, sexually abused her between the ages of six and twenty-two. Her lawsuit has fractured the family, and confirmed that wealth is no safeguard against child abuse [3].
  • Catholic Church Sex Scandal — Retired Pope Benedict XVI (former Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger) has asked forgiveness from victims for his mishandling of four Catholic Church sex abuse cases [4]. Ratzinger did not in so many words apologize or accept blame. He continues to deny personal responsibility for the rapes and sodomy perpetuated by his failure to curtail the ministries of pedophile priests when complaints first surfaced [5].

Continue reading →

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September 26, 2021 · 1:00 am

The Side of the Angels

File:Madonna with child and angels.jpg

“Madonna and Child with Angels” (1674) by Giovanni Battista Salvi da Sassoferrato, Galleria Nazionale d’Arte Antica, Rome, Italy
(PD-Art, PD-old)

“In the absence of light, darkness prevails.”

-Motto of the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense, “Hellboy” (Dark Horse Comics)

Heart wrenching tales of abuse could easily fill these pages.  Generally, I try to stay away from stories of that kind.  Too often, they leave us feeling helpless and hopeless.

When I do write about lost lives, the words are my poor attempt to honor those lives and bear witness to the loss.

It may be some small consolation that such children have gone home to God.  Their pain is over.  That should not, however, diminish our outrage.

There are, of course, countless unreported cases of abuse.  Names we will never know, though God is familiar with them all.

While those victims are gone, their struggle ended, our obligation is to fight on.  It is a way of fighting darkness and death, fighting evil.  We may not have been in a position to save the lives of those children.  But we can try to save our own.

Our struggle with darkness is not insignificant.  We may feel isolated, may feel that our scars are overwhelming.  And, in truth, those scars may last a lifetime.  Which makes our struggle all the more heroic.

If the lost children could speak, they would applaud our efforts.  They would wish us Godspeed.  They were not able to live in this sad world any longer.  But we may yet triumph for their sake.

In fighting the scars, the darkness, we are on the side of the angels.

“Praise the Lord, you His angels, you mighty ones who do His bidding, who obey His word.  Praise the Lord, all His heavenly hosts, you His servants who do His will…Praise the Lord, my soul” (Ps. 103: 20-22 NIV).

Originally posted 9/24/17

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: https://alawyersprayers.com

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