Monthly Archives: October 2020

“Shadow Puppets” by Melissa

WARNING:  Graphic Images

Below is a violent, firsthand account of child abuse — most particularly physical abuse.

Distressing accounts can be found for every category of abuse, whether physical, emotional, sexual, or neglect.  Thousands of children are murdered worldwide before they can ever tell their harrowing stories.  

The victims of child abuse prefer not to read such accounts.  We have scars enough to attest to the reality of abuse. 

But those who still think child abuse is an insignificant issue — a subject exaggerated by the press — should make a point of reading this account.  Two things will stand out:  the enormous courage of these children; and the enormous compassion of the author (“Melissa”), now an adult.

While “Melissa” did her very best to protect herself and her brothers against their father’s neglect and their mother’s rage, I cannot agree with her conclusion that abuse is simply a matter of mental illness.

Mental illness is real.  Evil is, also, however, real.  The distinction rests in the capacity to tell right from wrong.  Mental illness involves a compromised understanding of the world and/or a compromised ability to control one’s actions. 

Evil involves a deliberate choice.

“The way that the shadows played under the door, I could see that my favorite tree was gracefully dancing in the wind. The sunlight shot like a laser beam into the closet.  ‘Hey, lets play shadow puppets.’ I whispered to my little brother.  ‘Okay,’ he said.

This time, his lips only turned a small shade of blue.  My brother faced his head towards me and I made myself look into his eyes, holding my own grief so I could contain his.  I remember looking at my mother and wondering if this time was it, would she kill him? She would always stop -before she would suffocate him.

Mom had bad days.  Her children were the face of every single person that day that had hurt her, that had let her down, a family member, an argument with my Dad.  My brother and I never knew when our turn was going to be for mom to release her anger.  I always wondered when it would begin.  Would we be able to have the comfort of the closet, would we be able to see the closet this time around?  That was always my hope.  Mom would always begin with me.  I would lay down on the sofa and she would put a pillow over my face.  She would then sit on top of me and she proceeded to suffocate me. I always turned my head to the wall facing away because I knew that my little brother was there in the hallway.  I never wanted him to see my face. I never wanted him to see the fear and sometimes even the hope – that maybe I would die…”

[Continued at:  https://livinginjmj.com/2020/03/26/the/ ]

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: http://www.alawyersprayers.com

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Filed under Child Abuse, Child Molestation, Christianity, Emotional Abuse, Neglect, Physical Abuse, Sexual Abuse

Scars and Glory

“I’ve learned to be ashamed of all my scars
Run away, they say
No one’ll love you as you are

But I won’t let them break me down to dust
I know that there’s a place for us
For we are glorious”

“This Is Me” by Justin Paul and Benj Pasek,
Copyright © Kobalt Music Publishing

As abuse survivors, we carry scars – emotional, mental, and physical.  That is a fact of life for us.

To be ashamed of our scars is to be ashamed of who we are and who we were meant to be.  Afraid, we became valiant.  Humiliated, we grew resolute.  Weak and wounded, we found our strength.

Our scars are proof of that.  They are proof of the power with which we held onto life…and the Power that sustained us.

We have been hurt and we have been broken.  But we are still here.  We have been defiled and spat upon, rejected and reviled.  But we are still here.

We may not meet society’s standards for perfection.  We may not fit society’s mold of what it is to be acceptable.  Those standards are a product of ignorance.  That mold was meant to be broken.

Our scars are obvious.  But we are still here.  And our wounds are, also, our glory.

“In my deepest wound I saw Your glory and it astounded me.”

-St. Augustine of Hippo

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: https://alawyersprayers.com

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Filed under Child Abuse, Child Molestation, Christianity, domestic abuse, domestic violence, Emotional Abuse, Neglect, Physical Abuse, Religion, Sexual Abuse

Gym Class

Elektrostal Grammar School. Gymnasium No. 6, modeling lesson, Author Dmitry Makeev (CC BY-SA 4.0 International).

WARNING:  Graphic Images

Most of us remember gym class – the awkward uniforms, the pungent locker rooms, the embarrassment of the showers, the sting of chlorine in the pool.

For six year olds, gym class is less about competition than activities which increase balance, flexibility, coordination, and strength.  Gym class is about cartwheels and backward rolls; about jumping rope, and learning to walk a balance beam; about building confidence.

Unfortunately, the students of Springboro, OH gym teacher, John Austin Hopkins were exposed to much more.  Hopkins has been sentenced to 8 years in prison for gross sexual imposition on 27 first grade girls during gym class [1]. Continue reading

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Filed under bullying, Child Abuse, Child Molestation, Community, Emotional Abuse, Neglect, Physical Abuse, Sexual Abuse

Restraint

Posey straightjacket, Author Marc NL (PD)

Cornelius Fredericks, 16, started a food fight at a Michigan behavioral treatment facility, and wound up losing his life [1][2].

Lakeside Academy provides services to young adults either placed there by their parents or the foster care system.  Video from Lakeside shows Fredericks being restrained in the cafeteria by staff for around 8 minutes, before being given chest compressions, while unresponsive on the floor.  But portions of the video are missing.

Sequel Youth and Family Services, the owner of Lakeside Academy, admits that staff did not act in accord with the facility’s policy that restraint be employed as an emergency safety measure only when a student exhibits imminent danger to self or others.

Prosecutors say two staff members lay across Fredericks’ torso as they tried to restrain him.  Cornelius went into cardiac arrest, dying two days later at Bronson Methodist Hospital. Continue reading

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Filed under Child Abuse, Christianity, Emotional Abuse, Neglect, Physical Abuse, Religion, Sexual Abuse