Tag Archives: work ethic

Gaming the System, Part 1

Creative Commons Licensed Clipboard Fraud Image, Source Picpedia.org, Authors Nick Youngson http://www.nyphotographic.com/ and Alpha Stock Images https://alphastockimages.com/, (Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 Unported)

As we watch the family break down, government is both accelerating the process and attempting to take up the slack, albeit stumbling under the load [1][2].  On top of this, there are many whose aim in life is to “game the system” for their own benefit.  That has not helped.

The impact on children is particularly devastating.

Government Aid Programs

With charitable support by churches having weakened over the years, the need for government funding of poverty housing, nutritional assistance for the poor, and support for the disabled has increased [3][4][5].

  • Co-parenting – shared responsibility for childrearing by those no longer in a relationship – is a reality these days, as divorce rates attest [6].  Some 40% of first marriages end in divorce; 60% – 67% of second and third marriages end that way [7].  However, 2/3 of non-resident fathers avoid formal child support payments [8A].  Unpaid child support in the United States exceeds $32 billion [8B].
  • Illegitimacy rates (which plunge children into poverty) demonstrate that co-parenting would be a dream come true for many single parents abandoned by a partner [9][10].  By 2022, 52% of the children of single mothers were living below the poverty line. Welfare benefits and food stamps – the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) – are tremendously important.
  • Government benefits to physically or mentally disabled individuals can be a lifesaver. The caregivers paid by the government to regularly look after the sick, elderly, or disabled are a real blessing.

Fraud

Unfortunately, government programs meant to assist the needy cannot be effectively monitored, so fraud is easily missed [11].  There was, for instance, a massive Medicaid fraud exceeding $90 million recently uncovered in Minnesota [12].

Regrettably, there are those who see the government as an open cash register, readily susceptible to false claims:  claims that a relationship does not exist, even as children are brought into the world; claims of unemployment where employment “under the table” is ongoing, or income is derived by other illegal means; claims of disability where none exists; and claims of caregiving where none is rendered (or none needed at all) [13A].

Food stamps are traded by some for liquor, drugs, cigarettes or cash on the black market.  In 2019, there was an estimated $1 billion in such SNAP fraud [14].

In addition to this, scammers using skimming technology annually steal around $12 billion in food stamps from families [15]. 

Impact of Government Aid Programs on Marriage

“…If anyone will not work, neither shall he eat” (2 Thess. 3: 10).

But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (1 Tim. 5: 8).

Despite the best of intentions, many aid programs have had the unintended consequence of undermining both the work ethic and marriage [16][17][18]. 

Why work and be required to pay taxes, if the government is willing to provide food and housing [13B][19]?  Why marry and be required to support children, if the government is willing to do that?  So goes the warped thinking of more than a few.

Of course, no amount of government aid can replace an absent father in the life of a child [20][21][22].

Weaponized Protective Orders  

Meanwhile, overburdened courts, now faced with an avalanche of requests for Protective Orders in custody cases, struggle to distinguish between true and false claims of abuse [23].

[1] GovFacts, “How Government Is Adapting to the Changing American Family”, 8/25/25, https://govfacts.org/long-term-challenges-future/social-cultural-futures/changing-family-structures/how-government-is-adapting-to-the-changing-american-family/.

[2] Michael Carbonara, “What is the current trend in the American family structure? A clear overview” by Michael Carbonara, 2/20/26, https://michaelcarbonara.com/the-american-family-today-trends/.

[3]  NRB, “New Surveys Find Charitable Giving In Decline”, 8/8/14, https://nrb.org/new-surveys-find-charitable-giving-in-decline/.

[4]  Lake Institute on Faith & Giving, “Giving USA 2025:  Trends in Religious Giving” by Erica Dollhopf PhD,  https://lakeinstitute.org/resource-library/insights/july-15-2025/.

[5]  Horizons Stewardship, “Giving USA 2024:  Disturbing Trends Giving Trends”,  https://blog.horizons.net/giving-usa-research-giving-trends.

[6]   Centers for Disease Control (CDC), “Marriage and Divorce”, 3/17/25, https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/marriage-divorce.htm.

[7]  Divorce Law, “US Divorce Rate Hits 50-Year Low:  Only 40% of First Marriages Now End in Divorce” by Antonio Jimenez, Esq., 4/4/26, https://divorce.law/guides/news/us-divorce-rate-hits-50-year-low-only-40-percent-first-marriages-end-divorce/.

[8A and 8B]  Rich Niches, “Deadbeat Dad Statistics:  Understanding the Impact on Families and Society in 2023” by Ryan Kangail and Rich Niches, 6/2/26, https://richniches.com/deadbeat-dads-statistics/.

[9]  Centers for Disease Control (CDC), “Unmarried Childbearing”, 6/10/26, https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/unmarried-childbearing.htm.

[10]  Worldmetrics, “Single Mother Poverty Statistics” by Kathryn Blake, 5/5/26, https://worldmetrics.org/single-mother-poverty-statistics/.

[11]  Connect US, “17 Huge Advantages and Disadvantages of Welfare”, 5/17/19, https://connectusfund.org/17-huge-advantages-and-disadvantages-of-welfare.

[12] US Dept. of Justice, Office of Public Affairs, “Minnesota Health Care Fraud Takedown Results in Charges Against 15 Defendants for $90M in Fraud”, 5/21/26, https://www.justice.gov/opa/pr/minnesota-health-care-fraud-takedown-results-charges-against-15-defendants-over-90m-fraud#:~:text=The%20Justice%20Department%20today%20announced%20the%20Minnesota%20Health,and%20first-of-their%20kind%20charges%20involving%20additional%20Medicaid%20programs.

[13A and 13B]  Institute for Youth in Policy, “Cons: Welfare”, https://yipinstitute.org/article/cons-welfare.

[14]  Esquilo, “Who Buys Food Stamps for Cash:  The Truth Behind this Illicit Trade” by Stephen Adriano, 12/29/23, https://esquilo.io/food-stamps/who-buys-food-stamps-for-cash/.

[15]  Investigate TV, “Families suffer as $12 billion stolen from food assistance programs, USDA says” by Anastassia Olmos, 11/11/25, https://www.investigatetv.com/2025/11/11/families-suffer-12-billion-stolen-food-assistance-programs-usda-says/.

[16]  University of Maryland, School of Public Policy, Welfare Reform Academy, “Understanding the Rise in Illegitimacy” by Robert Rector, https://welfareacademy.umd.edu/conf/papers/rector_p.html.

[17]  US House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform, “Congressional Testimony by Robert Rector – Understanding Marriage Penalties in Welfare and Their Impact on Society”, 2/11/25, https://oversight.house.gov/wp-content/uploads/2025/02/Rector-Written-Testimony.pdf.

[18]  Brookings Institute, “Fragile Families, Welfare Reform, and Marriage” by Irwin Garfinkel, Ronald Mincy, and Sara McLanahan, 12/1/01, https://www.brookings.edu/articles/fragile-families-welfare-reform-and-marriage/.

[19]  Classroom/Synonym, “The Disadvantages of Social Welfare to Human Development” by Joel Garrison, 9/28/17, https://classroom.synonym.com/the-disadvantages-of-social-welfare-to-human-development-12084203.html.

[20]  The Parenting Pro, “Absent Fathers: How Fatherless Homes Affect Child Development” by Michael Bennett, 4/20/25, https://theparentingpro.com/effects-of-absent-fathers-on-child-development/.

[21]  NeuroLaunch, “Psychological Effects of Absent Parents:  Long-Term Impact on Children’s Well-Being”, 9/14/24 (Edited 7/3/26), https://neurolaunch.com/psychological-effects-of-absent-parents/.

[22]  Owlcation, “Echoes of Absence:  The Lasting Impact of A Missing Father”, 6/24/25, https://owlcation.com/social-sciences/psychological-effects-of-growing-up-without-a-father.

[23]  Attorney at Law Magazine, “The Silver Bullet Method:  The Rise of False Allegations in Divorce and Custody Cases” by Padideh Jafari, 3/3/25, https://attorneyatlawmagazine.com/legal/legal-trends/the-silver-bullet-method-the-rise-of-false-allegations-in-divorce-and-custody-cases.

This series will conclude next week.

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: https://alawyersprayers.com

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The Rose Garden, Chapter 7 – The Snow Fort

File:Snow Fort 2009.jpg

Snow fort, Author Andrew Wiseman (CC BY-SA 3.0 Unported)

For He says to the snow, ‘Fall on the earth’; Likewise to the gentle rain and the heavy rain of His strength” (Job 37: 6).

Winter followed summer, and one year another.  With time I acquired logic and organizational skills from my grandmother.  From my grandfather, I learned to dance.

My grandfather reveled in music.  Where my grandmother’s taste ran to hymns, he enjoyed livelier music — polkas, waltzes, mazurkas, csárdáses.  I first learned to dance to these standing on the sofa, supported in Grandpa’s arms.

As I grew older, he chided me sternly to dance in a ladylike manner — “Small steps, small steps!” — something I never quite mastered.  Absorbing my grandfather’s passion for life more readily than his instructions on decorum, I was routinely swept away by the music.

Grandpa taught me the difference between pints and quarts, patiently pouring paint from one can to another for me.

Grandpa was, also, the one to part my hair on the left.  I would stand between his knees, as he carefully plied the comb.  “No, not on the right, Annalein.  Never on the right.  Hitler parted his hair on the right.”

It was my father who cut my hair.  Since it was usually kept short, I worried that strangers might mistake me for a boy.

Evenings the family would sit contentedly listening to my grandfather’s large collection of records or watching televised wrestling with him.

Sunday afternoons, we would all listen to Strauss on the radio with its rotating display of vinyl fish.  My sister and I would lie on the living room rug on these afternoons, drawing or coloring as the sun spilled through the windows.

My recollection of Grandpa is of a smiling, mustachioed man in a white cotton undershirt — a glass of beer and a box of crackers at his side. Continue reading

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The Rose Garden, Chapter 3 – History Lessons

File:Ethnic Map of Hungary 1910 with Counties.png

1910 Map of Hungary (ethnicities indicated), Author Ascended Dreamer,
(CC BY-SA 4.0 International)

Then the children of Israel journeyed from Rameses to Succoth, about six hundred thousand men on foot, besides children.  A mixed multitude went up with them also, and flocks and herds — a great deal of livestock” (Ex. 12: 37-38).

The year before my father died, my sister decided he should write down his life story.  She was adamant that both our parents do this, in fact.

So, in two lined, spiral notebooks, Ma and Pop wrote out the family history in longhand.  This was especially difficult for my mother who had earlier suffered a stroke and was nearly illiterate, in any case.

I have the notebooks.  It took me four years to read through them.  Not because of their length, but because of the emotion their contents evoked in me.

Hungary

My parents’ story begins in Hungary.  Then as now, Hungary (Magyarország) was a small, landlocked country in Central Europe.

Since earliest times, Hungary has been a crossroads with a mix of peoples.   Celts, Romans, and Huns; Slavs, Franks, and Bulgars; Magyars and Mongols; Ottomans and Austrians; Serbs, Croatians, Romanians and Czechs; finally Germans and Russians were among those who occupied the territory —  all, in their turn, migrating, invading, vying for power, uniting, dividing, and intermingling.

As I search the narratives for clues to my father’s character and his choices, I find the related history — family and national — immensely moving.

Not only is this my heritage, I see my life mirrored in these events.  Like Hungary, itself, I have been enriched by many sources.  Like Hungary, the territory that is my life has been embattled.

The Great Swabian Trek

Some 150,000 Germans were relocated to Hungary by the Austrian Hapsburgs during the 18th Century.  Their migration came to be known as the “Great Swabian Trek.”

Although from a variety of regions (with many dialects), German settlers were disparagingly called “Swabians” by the Hungarians.  The name came to mean all Germans who settled the Danube valley, an unwanted ethnic group.

Despite hardship, German immigrants to Hungary greatly increased the economic prosperity of that country.  The Banat region where they settled later became known as the “breadbasket of Europe.”

My parents’, grandparents’, and great-grandparents’ lives played out against this background.  This work ethic shaped my life. Continue reading

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