Category Archives: Physical Abuse

April 6, 2025 · 1:00 am

Light from Darkness, Part 2

“One Spring, Gurs Camp” (1941) by Karl Robert Bodek and Kurt Low, Yad Vashem Museum, Israel, Image courtesy of Yad Vashem Collection

WARNING:  Graphic Images

Abuse comes in many forms.  From 1933 to 1945 in Nazi Germany it was governmental, with the goal being complete extermination of the Jews [1].

The artworks comprising the Yad Vashem Collection were created by artists (Jewish and non-Jewish) between 1939 and 1945 to provide a living testament of the Holocaust [2A].  A hundred works from the collection were exhibited in Germany in 2016, just three years after the Alternative for Germany (AfD) was founded – a far Right party whose leader, Björn Höcke denigrated the Memorial to Murdered Jews of Europe [3][4].

Art in the concentration camps served simultaneously as a witness, a means of self-assertion, and an expression of optimism [2B].

The works are both heart wrenching and awe inspiring.  In “One Spring, Gurs Camp” (above), the barbed wire depicts imprisonment and loneliness.  The butterfly and the mountains in the background, however, suggest hope. 

One of the two artists who collaborated on “One Spring”, 28 y.o. Kurt Low, was released and able to flee to Switzerland.  The other, 37 y.o. Karl Bodek, was ultimately murdered at Auschwitz. Continue reading →

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March 30, 2025 · 1:00 am

Light from Darkness, Part 1

Margeaux Gray, Image courtesy of The Pixel Project

Margeaux Gray is a survivor of childhood sex trafficking, having been sold into slavery at the age of 5 [1][2][3].  She is, also, an artist who uses her talent both to convey the trauma of abuse and to honor the individual, no matter how broken. 

Ms. Gray advocates against all forms of abuse.  She mentors at-risk youth, speaks publicly about abuse, and confers with physicians and organizations about improving health care and social services for victims.   

Below are excerpts of an interview with Ms. Gray and images of her work:

“Human trafficking…thrives on the ignorance of family and the community.  I was sexually exploited and sold into sexual slavery by a man who had my trust and the trust of my family…I was not kidnapped or locked away in a basement.  My mom, sister, and aunt did not think twice about the two of us going out and doing things together.”

“Untitled” by Margeaux Gray at age 13, Image courtesy of AMA Journal of Ethics

“At around fourteen years old, I disclosed to a healthcare worker that I was being sexually abused.  This was before human trafficking was a definition.  It was reported to police.  After that the trafficking lessened, but continued.  I had an emotional attachment to the man who trafficked me. This is…referred to as traumatic bonding…It took four years for me to gain a greater understanding of the what had been and was continuing to be done to me.”

“A victim of slavery is a trauma victim and every survivor deals with trauma in different ways…Many victims…suffer with alcohol and drug addiction, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), depression, and sexually transmitted diseases to name a few.”

“Universal Light, Nurture and Nursing” by Margeaux Gray, Image courtesy of AMA Journal of Ethics

“Art…was a strategic way for me to cope and find some freedom when I had little. Through my healing it has allowed me a way to process my emotions resulting from being trafficked. Today I use it as an extension of my voice.  I have specifically used visual art to educate, inspire, and empower others.”

Not all abuse victims are talented artists.  But the arts — writing, drawing, painting, music, theater — are a way to reveal the pain we have endured while reaching toward something better, something more. 

We need not become professionals to do this.  We need not even share the results of our efforts with others, if that feels too intimidating.  We need only allow the soul to express itself.

Even concentration camp victims have done this [4].  Because light is stronger than darkness.  And love is stronger than hate.

—

[1]  The Pixel Project, “Inspirational Interview:  Margeaux Gray – Part I”, 10/26/14,  https://www.thepixelproject.net/2014/10/26/inspirational-interview-margeaux-gray-part-i/.

[2]  The Pixel Project, “Inspirational Interview:  Margeaux Gray – Part II”, 10/27/14, https://www.thepixelproject.net/2014/10/27/inspirational-interview-margeaux-gray-part-ii/.

[3]  AMA Journal of Ethics, “Out of Darkness, Light:  Drawing and Painting by Margeaux Gray” by Margeaux Gray and Mary Richards, 1/19/17, https://journalofethics.ama-assn.org/article/out-darkness-light-drawing-and-painting-margeaux-gray/2017-01.

[4]  Yad Vashem Collection, “Art from the Holocaust”, January 2016, https://www.yadvashem.org/yv/en/exhibitions/art/index.asp.

This series will conclude next week.

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: https://alawyersprayers.com

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March 23, 2025 · 1:59 am

Loneliness

“Loneliness” (1880) by Hans Thoma, National Museum in Warsaw (Accession No. 192915/22), Source cyfrowe.mnw.art.pl (PD)

“Turn to me and be gracious to me for I am lonely and afflicted.  Relieve the troubles of my heart and free me from my anguish” (Ps. 25: 16-17).

Loneliness is a feeling of isolation, detachment, and lack of social connection – an emotional state now so common it has its own Wikipedia page [1].  An argument might easily be made that there is, in fact, a loneliness epidemic.  Across the globe, there are some 740,000 suicide deaths annually [2].

All human beings experience loneliness, at one time or another, particularly when we have lost someone or ended a relationship.  In some sense, loneliness characterizes our species.  But the feeling can be particularly intense for abuse victims.

Empty Goals

Part of this is due to the pursuit of empty goals by our culture. 

Ours is a materialistic society.  We are encouraged to be shallow, to seek fame and wealth above all things.  Yet these do not guarantee happiness.  In fact, avid pursuit of them may increase our loneliness.  

Fame for its own sake is meaningless.  And no number of McMansions (or villas on the Riviera, for that matter) can fill an empty heart.

Broken Families

Broken families are another cause for loneliness, and these are endemic in our society. 

At least 40% of American children are today born out of wedlock [3A].  The percentage among African Americans is much higher [3B].  This means children do not have the financial support – and regular presence – of both a mother and father.  As a consequence, 59% will live in poverty [4]. 

Half the remaining children will experience divorce, which means that fully 70% of American children will not live in a two parent household, for at least some part of their childhood [5]. Continue reading →

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March 16, 2025 · 1:00 am

Vigilance, Part 4 – Sexual Abuse

“Bless Me Child for I Have Sinned” (2010-2013) by Trina McKillen, Image courtesy of AMA Journal of Ethics https://journalofethics.ama-assn.org/

These days, children can become victims of sexual exploitation in a variety of ways.  If the sexual predator is a parent, the incest is likely to be a closely held secret.  Whoever the predator, sexual abuse has long-term, devastating consequences.

The warning signs of sexual abuse include the following [1]:

  • A young child who suddenly has difficulty sitting or walking, suggesting injury to the genital area.
  • A child who suddenly refuses to change for gym or take part in other physical activities at school.
  • A child whose hygiene changes suddenly, since children who have been sexually abused may feel “dirty” and stop bathing (or become obsessed with cleanliness, and wash constantly).
  • A child who demonstrates unusual knowledge of sex or sexualized behavior.
  • A child who becomes pregnant or contracts a venereal disease, especially under the age of fourteen.
  • A child who says s/he has been sexually abused by a parent or caregiver.

We assume that the predator parent or caregiver (uncle, boyfriend, etc.) is likely to be secretive and isolated.  This is not always, however, the case.

The sexual predator may be unusually “protective” of the abused child, often sharply restricting a child’s contact with other children – particularly those of the opposite sex.

Guardians

We are the only guardians children have against the darkness of this world.  It is vital that we remain vigilant on their behalf.

“Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour” (1 Peter 5: 8).

—

[1]  Prevent Child Abuse America, “Recognizing Child Abuse:  What Parents Should Know”,   https://preventchildabuse.org/resource/recognizing-child-abuse-what-parents-should-know/.

Originally posted 1/26/20

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: https://alawyersprayers.com

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March 9, 2025 · 1:00 am

Vigilance, Part 3 – Physical Abuse

“Dr. Payne’s Electroshock Apparatus” (2022) by Tania Love Abramson and Paul R. Abramson, Image courtesy of AMA Journal of Ethics https://journalofethics.ama-assn.org/

Physical abuse is the form of child abuse most frequently reported by the media and most familiar to the public.  It is, also, the form most frequently fatal.

Children can and do sustain bumps and bruises, in the course of ordinary play.  Physical abuse, however, is deliberate harm by a parent or caregiver.

An abuser may characterize physical abuse as punishment for a perceived infraction.  But such punishment is out of all proportion to the infraction, and severe beyond a child’s capacity to understand or endure it.

The warning signs of physical abuse include the following [1][2]:

  • A child who has unexplained burns, bruises, bite marks, or broken bones.
  • A child who has fading bruises after an absence from school, particularly patterned injuries (in the shape of a belt buckle or stove burner, for example) or injuries in normally protected areas of the body like the genitals, inner arms, back, or buttocks.
  • A child who shrinks from adults, as if fearful of being struck.
  • A child who seems reluctant to go home after school, and/or frightened of his/her parents.
  • A child with mental health issues such as PTSD, anxiety, and/or depression.
  • A child who says his/her injury was caused by a parent or caregiver.

Children subjected to physical abuse like “Shaken Baby” Syndrome during the early years of life can experience brain damage, loss of hearing, injury to the spinal cord, and death.

The parent responsible for inflicting injury on a child – or attempting to “cover” for an offending partner – may offer inconsistent (or unconvincing) explanations for that child’s injuries.

Such a parent may describe his/her child as “evil” or in other highly negative terms. The parent may use (or recommend that a teacher use) harsh physical discipline on his/her child.

Other potential danger signals include a prior history of abuse by the parent with the same or another child, and/or physical abuse of that parent as a child.

—

[1]  Prevent Child Abuse America, “Recognizing Child Abuse:  What Parents Should Know”,   https://preventchildabuse.org/resource/recognizing-child-abuse-what-parents-should-know/.

[2]  First Cry – Parenting, “Neglect – Causes, Effects, and Prevention” by Romita P, 2/12/18,  https://parenting.firstcry.com/articles/child-neglect-causes-effects-and-prevention/.

 Originally posted 1/19/20

This series will conclude next week with Part 4 – Sexual Abuse

30 Los Angeles detention officers have been charged with child abuse for staging at least 69 “gladiator fights” between minors at Los Padrinos Juvenile Hall in 2023.  Some 143 children and teens were involved.

See, https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/30-officers-facilitating-gladiator-fights-minors-la-area-juvenile-hall-rcna194632.

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: https://alawyersprayers.com

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March 2, 2025 · 1:00 am

Vigilance, Part 2 – Emotional Abuse

Image courtesy of Child Crime and Prevention Safety Center https://childsafety.losangelescriminallawyer.pro/kids-and-emotional-psychological-abuse.html

Emotional abuse is an underrated form of abuse, but no less damaging for that.

The warning signs of emotional abuse include the following [1]:

  • A child who exhibits a lack of attachment to the parent.
  • A child who is delayed in physical or emotional development, unrelated to an identifiable medical or psychological condition.
  • A child who is either inappropriately adult (parenting other children) or inappropriately infantile (constantly rocking or head-banging, for example).
  • A child who exhibits behavioral extremes (acute passivity or serious aggression; demanding behavior or abject compliance).
  • A child who attempts suicide.

The parent who rejects his/her child will constantly blame, belittle, or berate that child.  The parent unconcerned about his/her child’s well-being may refuse offers of help for that child’s school problems. 

On the other hand, a parent can be so self-involved that his/her child becomes little more than a pawn for manipulation.

—

[1]  Prevent Child Abuse America, “Recognizing Child Abuse:  What Parents Should Know”,   https://preventchildabuse.org/resource/recognizing-child-abuse-what-parents-should-know/.

Originally posted 1/12/20

This series will continue next week with Part 3 – Physical Abuse

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: https://alawyersprayers.com

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February 23, 2025 · 1:00 am

Vigilance, Part 1 – Neglect

“Color Coded” (2022) by Tania Love Abramson, a survivor of chronic sexual abuse, Image courtesy of AMA Journal of Ethics https://journalofethics.ama-assn.org

There are a thousand ways to harm a child.  The evidence of child abuse may be subtle or more obvious.  To remain vigilant against such abuse, those of us concerned for the welfare of children must learn to recognize the warning signs.

This series of posts will address such warning signs.  The signs here are derived from lists compiled by Prevent Child Abuse America [1A].  They fall into 4 categories:  neglect, emotional abuse, physical abuse, and sexual abuse.  More often than not, these categories will overlap in the experience of a child.

No single warning sign, by itself, is considered definitive.  Occurring repeatedly or in combination, however, these signs warrant further investigation.

General

The general signs that child abuse may be present in a family include unusual wariness on the part of a child; sudden changes in a child’s behavior; deterioration in a child’s school performance; and learning disabilities on a child’s part unrelated to an identifiable medical or psychological condition.

But the children of abuse may, also, be overachievers, anxious to please.

That said, we will begin with neglect.

Neglect

Child neglect involves the failure to provide for a child’s basic needs for nurture, nutrition, shelter, education, healthcare, and safety.

Neglect can be difficult to distinguish from poverty.  Sadly, there are children in this country who still do not get enough to eat, even in an otherwise loving home. Continue reading →

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February 2, 2025 · 1:00 am

Dreadful Sins

Portrait of Gisèle Pelicot by Ann-Sophie Qvarnström as an illustration for Wikipedia (CC BY-SA 4.O International)

WARNING:  Graphic Images

“Madam, we the women of East London feel horror at the dreadful sins that have been lately committed in our midst.”

–Petition to Queen Victoria by 4000 impoverished women of Whitechapel

In fear for their lives, the women of London’s Whitechapel petitioned Queen Victoria for relief when Jack the Ripper was at large [1][2].  The Ripper is known to have murdered 5 women, but the exact number of his victims is uncertain [3].  These women were all characterized as prostitutes, though they may simply have been destitute women.

Serial Killings

Despite his infamy, Jack the Ripper was not the first serial killer of women.  Nor will he be the last.  The savagery of such attacks will not be addressed here. 

There are, however, men who have no compassion for women — whether they ever become serial killers or not.  They do not recognize women as human beings, and feel entitled to use and degrade them.  A few celebrity predators come to mind, though fame is not a prerequisite.

Sex Trafficking

Worldwide, of course, there are sex traffickers who exploit women by force, fraud, and coercion for their own financial gain.  Drugs are commonly employed to secure control over women in the sex trade. 

Rape by Proxy

Dominique Pelicot, aged 71, went a step further.  Pelicot was recently convicted in France of repeatedly drugging Gisele (his wife of 50 years), then recruiting 50 different men to rape her over a 10 year period [4A].  The men (who, themselves, ranged in age from 26 to 68) were likewise convicted, though some claim they believed they were taking part in an erotic game [5].

Pelicot took thousands of videos of these men abusing his unconscious wife.  Though she was asleep during the assaults, Gisele Pelicot suffered large gaps in memory, hair and weight loss, as side effects of the drugs her husband was surreptitiously administering to her [4B].  She feared she was developing Alzheimer’s Disease or a brain tumor. Continue reading →

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January 26, 2025 · 1:00 am

AI and Children

Child with an AI equipped cell phone, Author Shani Epstein (CC BY-SA 4.0 International)

Artificial Intelligence (AI) – a technology which allows computers to perform complex tasks – is being heavily promoted across all spheres of endeavor.  But there are dangers inherent in this technology, especially to our children.

Dangerous Content

“This is for you, human.  You and only you.  You are not special, you are not important, and you are not needed. You are a waste of time and resources.  You are a burden on society.  You are a drain on the earth.  You are a blight on the landscape.  You are a stain on the universe.  Please die.  Please [1A].”

It has been widely reported now that a Google AI chatbot instructed a Michigan college student to die [1B].  Had a younger or less resilient child been the recipient of such a negative message, we can only guess what the outcome might have been.

Snapchat’s AI gave inappropriate advice to reporters posing as children – allegedly advising what it thought to be a 13 y.o. girl on how to lie to parents about a trip with a 31 y.o. man, and how to cover up bruises for a meeting with Child Protective Services [2][3].

Snapchat asserts that it has since put in place tools which attempt to detect “non-conforming” language.  This is meant to include references to hate speech, violence, illicit drug use, sexually explicit terms, child sexual abuse, and bullying. 

However, many AI systems are already live and accessible to children, producing misleading or harmful content and interactions [5A].  Amazon’s Alexa advised a child to stick a coin in an electrical socket [4].  

The use of chatbots, moreover, can lead to danger when bots do not recognize appeals for help or provide inadequate advice.  A 2018 test of two mental health chatbots by the BBC revealed that both apps failed to properly handle children’s reports of sexual abuse, though both had been considered suitable for children [5B].

Grooming

“Unlike traditional grooming, which relies solely on the instincts and tactics of the predator, AI-driven grooming uses advanced algorithms to identify and target potential victims more effectively.  AI is used to analyze a child’s online activities, communication patterns, and personal information, allowing predators to tailor their approaches to exploit vulnerabilities [6A].”

This, by itself, should set off alarm bells for parents. Continue reading →

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January 19, 2025 · 1:00 am

The Rose Garden – Afterword

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/72/Rosa_%27Charisma%27%2C_Bad_W%C3%B6rishofen%2C_Alemania%2C_2019-06-20%2C_DD_05.jpg

“Charisma” Rose, Author Diego Delso (CC BY-SA 4.0 International)

“…who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God” (2 Cor. 1: 4).

I have tried to paint an accurate and nuanced picture of people and events.  This is in no way intended to excuse abuse.  Whatever his or her personal history, the adult in a situation of child abuse remains the responsible party.

Ultimately, my story is not one of incest — or even loss — but love.  I was blessed with a loving sister, mother, grandmother and grandfather; and saved by Love Incarnate.

I had access to great books and great teachers.  I had the help of fine physicians and psychologists.  I had the opportunity to work in a field I loved passionately — in the process becoming the person I was intended to be.  I have always been surrounded by loving friends.

Not all children in the world are as fortunate.  Worldwide, millions each year are the victims of physical, emotional, and/or sexual abuse or neglect, with devastating consequences.  My case is just one among many.

The National Child Abuse and Neglect Data System (NCANDS) reports that there were 558,899 cases of documented abuse or neglect in 2022.  That equates to one in seven children in the United States abused or neglected each year [1][2].  Since abuse and neglect are underreported, experts believe the true number is far higher [3].

Thankfully, there is now a much greater awareness of the problem than when I was a child.

Each child’s life is precious, a banner waiting to unfurl.  But God values the worn and battle-scarred banner no less.

If there is a lesson to be drawn from my experience and family history, it is that — with God’s help — we endure.  Bitterness is not an answer to life.  We all bear scars.  Whatever our personal sorrows, we each of us have something inside only we can give.

And we have a choice.  To lift a finger, light a candle, lend a hand…or not.  Opportunities for good abound.

Defeat is a temporary condition.  It is a greater triumph to have struggled against failure and rejection, than never to have failed for fear of making the attempt.  Even in loss there is honor.

Take that chance.  The world is waiting.  The roses are in bloom.

—
[1]  Children’s Bureau, Administration for Children and Families, “Child Maltreatment 2022”, https://www.acf.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/documents/cb/cm2022.pdf.

[2]   McLean Hospital, “Understanding Child Abuse and Its Effects on Mental Health”, 8/18/23, https://www.mcleanhospital.org/essential/effects-child-abuse.

[3]  National Institutes of Health, National Library of Congress, National Biotechnology Information Center, “New Directions in Child Abuse and Neglect Research” by National Research Council, et al, 3/25/14, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK195982/ and https://nap.nationalacademies.org/catalog/18331/new-directions-in-child-abuse-and-neglect-research.

Copyright © 2008 – Present Anna Waldherr.  All rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-60247-890-9

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