In the Aftermath of Abuse, Part 6 – Restoring the Relationship with God

Open Bible, Author “The Photographer” (CC0 1.0 Universal Public Domain Dedication)

The abuse experience can warp the lens through which victims see themselves and the world.  It skews even their view of God, since He – perhaps more so than the predator – is blamed for the abuse.

Abuse victims must be permitted to vent the full range of emotions elicited by the violation, if their faith in God and relationship with Him are to be restored.

God’s continuing love for abuse victims is more powerful than any symptoms or shame.  This does not necessarily mean that the scars of abuse will be erased.  Victims are likely to need frequent reminders, both of God’s love and His mercy.

He hath not dealt with us after our sins; nor rewarded us according to our iniquities. For as the heaven is high above the earth, so great is His mercy toward them that fear Him. As far as the east is from the west, so far hath He removed our transgressions from us” (Psalm 103: 10-12).

” ‘Come now, let us reason together,’ says the Lord. ‘Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool’ “  (Isaiah 1: 18).

” ‘I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions, for My own sake, and remembers your sins no more’ ”  (Isaiah 43: 25).

Victims might ask themselves whether they would judge another exploited child by the same harsh standards they have applied to themselves; whether the thoughts and behaviors they now characterize as defective on their part would have occurred at all, if they had not been abused.

Originally posed 8/18/13

Of note, the Sex Trafficking Act was this week signed into law.  The “Allow States and Victims to Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act of 2017” (often referred to as FOSTA) creates a new federal offense which prohibits owning or operating a website or other technology platform with the intent to facilitate prostitution.  Penalties can run as high as 25 years in prison. 

Sex trafficking victims may, in addition, bring civil suits against the websites that hosted ads that enabled their trafficking.



Filed under Child Abuse, Child Molestation, Christianity, Emotional Abuse, Neglect, Physical Abuse, Religion, Sexual Abuse

8 responses to “In the Aftermath of Abuse, Part 6 – Restoring the Relationship with God

  1. I think too many forget that it’s okay to direct your anger at God.

    • I agree. Victims are often counseled to “forgive and forget” before they have had an opportunity to vent their anger, before even the extent of the harm done to them is clear. God is big enough to deal with victims’ anger. He understands their pain.

      • Very true. I always think that those counseling to forgive and forget are not that well informed and are possibly trying to hide their own guilt / shame. When the only one who should be truly ashamed is the perpetrator.

        I think I mentioned Andrew Vachss to you? He was a Law Guardian and wrote down his experiences in fictional form. Some very heavy stuff. But if I remember correctly (haven’t read him in ages) he’d always counsel to stay angry. Wish there was some middle ground, because I don’t think just raging away is the best answer either. To me that can take away from the sadness, and you need all the five stages of grief. Because – to me at least – it’s also a mourning process.

      • You are so right. It is a mourning process.

      • I still feel that society has reached an impasse with this as well. As though we somehow managed to arrive at a certain point and decided that was just good enough, instead of exploring things further.

  2. Amen-Amen Sister in Christ Jesus-Yeshua Anna!! God Bless you Sister in Christ Jesus-Yeshua Anna and Your Family members and Friends!! ❤

    May our ONE TRUE GOD THE FATHER who art in Heaven Above Bless all my Sisters and Brothers in Christ Jesus-Yeshua and my Messianic Jewish Sisters and Brothers in Christ Jesus-Yeshua and Your Families and Friends!!

    I Love you all Everyone through Jesus-Yeshua Christ, because HE LOVED 💜💕 EVERYONE FIRST!!

    Love 💕 Always and Shalom ( Peace ), YSIC \o/

    Kristi Ann

  3. Great line: “God’s continuing love for abuse victims is more powerful than any symptoms or shame.”

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