Tag Archives: sexuality

Sins Against Self, Part 1

Medieval flagellants as pictured in Nuremberg Chronicle by Hartmann Schedel (1440-1514) (PD)

As abuse victims, we are, for the most part, more sinned against than sinning.  Abuse leaves a devastating scar across our lives.  About that there is no doubt.

That does not, however, mean we do not sin, ourselves.  Many of our own sins are against the self, a direct result of the abuse we suffered [1][2].  And God loves us so much He wants better for us than that.

Low Self-Esteem

Believing ourselves worthless, we treat ourselves that way.  We view any kindness toward ourselves as undeserved, and turn aside those who would love us (sometimes causing unintended pain to others, in the process).

Disordered Sexuality

In a desperate effort to find the love we were denied, we seek it in all the wrong places.  Far too often, we are drawn to partners who re-enact the abuse so familiar to us.  Or we settle for less than we deserve, giving ourselves away to any comers, rather than respecting our own bodies. 

A few of us take the other direction, and forego the sexuality with which God endowed us or reject the gender God assigned us.  That is no wiser, though it may temporarily feel safer.

We may assume this does not grieve God, but it does [3].  He suffers with us, and weeps for us. Continue reading

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Filed under Child Abuse, Child Molestation, Christianity, domestic abuse, domestic violence, Emotional Abuse, Neglect, Physical Abuse, Religion, Sexual Abuse, Violence Against Women

Theybies

Image in Public Domain as work prepared by an officer or employee of the US Govt.

There is a tragic new parenting trend:  parents who raise their children without identifying the children’s gender, even to the children [1][2]. 

Such parents view gender as entirely fluid, divorced from biological sex, and something a child should choose later in life.  They use the gender-neutral pronouns “they/them” when referring to their children; use gender-neutral clothing for their children; and buy their children gender-neutral toys.

There are multiple videos on YouTube praising this approach.  Brands, in fact, are marketing to this trend [3].

Undoubtedly, these parents believe they have their children’s best interests at heart.  Many view the “assignment” of a child’s gender at birth (the terminology now applied to identifying a child by his or her biological sex) as presumptuous. 

They want to offer their children the broadest possible range of opportunities in life (something gender linked to biological sex is seen as restricting). Continue reading

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Filed under Child Abuse, Child Molestation, Christianity, Emotional Abuse, Neglect, Physical Abuse, Religion, Sexual Abuse