“Female Nude in a Landscape” by Hans Heyerdahl (1857 -1913), Location/Source National Museum of Art, Architecture and Design (Accession No. NG.M.03536), Oslo, Norway (PD)
WARNING: Graphic Images
This skin suit that surrounds me, more wrinkled now than any “lawyer suit” I ever owned, is no longer smooth, no longer supple. It is marred by scars and stretch marks, like the tributaries of some ancient river; has been visited by varicosities, by callouses, hives, rashes, and eruptions too often to count.
But once this skin knew the joy of raindrops. Once it knew the fever that passion evokes.
This skin suit that envelopes me has been bruised, pierced, incised, and sutured; has been burned by the sun to a poison apple red.
This skin has been stroked and patted, been tenderly groomed, oh so tenderly violated, again and again and again and again – each cell silently screaming in protest, recoiling in horror.
This skin suit of mine has served as a witness to all the best and worst aspects of my life, to the weakness and the strength, the failures and the triumphs; has lain prostrate with pain, overcome by grief, yet risen to see the glory of a new dawn, and lived to praise God for His deliverance.
“And after my skin is destroyed, this I know,
That in my flesh I shall see God…” (Job 19: 26).
Originally posted 3/5/17
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ANNA WALDHERR A Voice Reclaimed, Surviving Child Abuse 
Anna,
Your words carry the weight of profound truth – how our very flesh becomes the keeper of both our darkest hours and our brightest moments of grace. The courage it takes to speak such honesty into the world is remarkable indeed.
That skin which bore witness to such cruelty has also felt raindrops and passion’s fever. It has risen from prostration to praise, transforming wounds into wisdom. Like Job, you have emerged from the furnace not unscathed, but gloriously alive.
Your survival itself is a declaration that darkness does not have the final word. Thank you for sharing this sacred testimony.
With deep respect for your journey,
Bob
“darkness does not have the final word” — That is exactly right, Bob. Whatever the trials we may experience in this world, we carry on for Christ is our strength.
Anna, the longer I’ve known you, the more deeply I’ve come to admire your strength and resilience.
Yet it also leaves me melancholic, thinking of all that you—and so many others—have been put through.
You are very kind, Hubert. This is a broken world. There is little justice here, no way to recompense the suffering some endure. But we are not citizens of this world. We are citizens of heaven. God will one day balance the scales, and the tears shed in this world will be forgotten. I trust in that.
I feel that sometimes, beyond the obvious villains, it is those who choose self-preservation—those who turn a blind eye to wrongdoing—who also bear responsibility. I admit with shame that I once belonged to those cowards. I can only hope to act differently at a next opportunity, better prepared this time.
I am sure you are being far too hard on yourself, Hubert. But if my experience can in some small way raise awareness, then it has served a purpose.
Without a test, there can be no testimony. Your is a powerful reminder that our God has made us overcomers through Him!
I know my sins and failings, Ron. Despite them, God has held me up. I pray that He may use me for His Kingdom, and that my story may help others.
Yes, He knows all of our many sins and failures, but the great thing is His love never fails us!
“yet risen to see the glory of a new dawn, and lived to praise God for His deliverance.” Evocative testimony, Anna. ❤️
Many thanks, Iris. ❤
Keep writing and keep on encouraging….🌹
🙂
Powerful words, emotional words. I enjoyed your use of the Job verse to overcome the often painful human experience. I hope you’ve had a great week, Anna.
–Scott
Thank you so much, Scott. They came from the heart. Have a blessed week.
The painting marries the words in this heartfelt piece
The beauty and the pain reminds me of Beethoven’s Heiligenstadt Testament
But it is poetry that is deeply confessional and laid bare
🙏😌
Good work 👏
Anna, I am so glad I come by today to read this profound post. You always cause me to think deep and reflect on life. As a young women it was hard to believe I would someday live in a 78 year dress of flesh with all it issues.
When my dad died at 58 the undertaker told me his body was in bad shape due to his alcoholic life. For the first time I thought about how my body would look when I die. I take better care of my body now because it needs it. I spend a lot more time taking care of my mind, reading and listening to what brings me wisdom and peace. Out of the heart flows the issue of life. Thank you again for your words that encourage and lift up our Savior.
You are very kind. Yes, time changes our perspective, along w/ our bodies. Yet God loves us whatever our age. May He bless you always. ❤
I am not ready to talk about this, but I am here and reading. This piece is really good, and really real.
If it helped you, even in a small way, I am immensely gratified. ❤
“Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning.” (Psalm 30: 5) and Paul tells us “The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.” (Rom. 11:12) Soon we will awaken to joy unspeakable when Christ Jesus returns. Until then, may the light of His love wrap around you, Anna, like the new skin that awaits you and every one of our brothers and sisters In the new heavens and new earth, and that Day when He will wipe away every tear, and there will be no pain and sorrow.
Anna, your words transform pain into witness, and wounds into wisdom. Reading this, I am reminded that every scar—visible or hidden—tells a story of survival, resilience, and the quiet courage to rise again. Your testimony is both heartbreaking and profoundly uplifting.
You are so kind, Livora. ❤