Precious

“A Grandmother’s Love” (Courtesy of Women’s UN Reporting Network and USA National Resource Center on Domestic Violence)

A good-for-nothing man is an evil-doer; he goes on his way causing trouble with false words…” (Prov. 6: 12).

Baby girl, you are so precious.  You are so precious, you don’t even know.  Your Momma and I loved you from the moment she brought you into this world.  Even before that.  Your Daddy left early on, but we loved you just the same.

We rocked you, walked the floors with you when you were teething, saw you take your first step.  We cooked for you, we mended your clothes.  We saw you on the bus that first day of school.  You were so pretty, your hair all done up in ribbons.  Maybe you can’t remember, but I do.

You and I, we lost your Momma to hard work, then no work, then those devil drugs.  You must have asked me a million times where she was, on those nights she didn’t come home to us.  But she loved you.  She tried her best.  It just wasn’t enough in this cruel world.

Your Momma tried to help you with your lessons, in the beginning, taught you one and one makes two.  Do you remember that?  It was just that the lessons she had to learn were harder – lessons about hard men, and the hard road a woman faces alone.

Now you want to run after this man!  This good-for-nothing man?!  You think he’s going to give you something you don’t already have?  He doesn’t want to give.  All he wants to do is take from you.  Take your hips, take your fresh young face, take your smile.  But you believe his promises, promises as empty as noise.

Is it because your Daddy wasn’t there to tell you how special you are?  Is it because you didn’t see yourself in his eyes?  We tried, your Momma and I, tried to tell you that, tried to show you every which way we could.  Try and remember, baby girl.

I had to turn her out, your Momma.  I know you remember that.  You cried and cried.  You went and sat in your closet, nearly cried your eyes out.

You think I didn’t love her, my own daughter?  But it got to a point she’d take anything in the house, anything she could sell or trade for those drugs of hers.   And we didn’t have much to start with.  It got to a point I had to say no, had to stop forgiving her.

I know the Lord says seventy times seven.  I know.  But when it got to seventy times seven and one, when I had to choose between you and your Momma, sweet baby, I chose you.  After all, you had no one else.  What else could I do?

I was too old to start over raising a little girl.  Only I couldn’t leave you, not with those big, sad eyes of yours.  It broke my heart, when we heard it was over.  But she’s at peace now.  At least your Momma is at peace.

As for you.  You worthless piece of trash.  What are you doing sniffing around my baby girl?  You don’t fool me.  You’re not “thirty something”.  That’s a load of horse manure.  You’re old enough to be her father!  For shame!

Do you want the same done to your own little girls?  To the children you left behind you like Easter eggs, with a half-dozen different women?  Or does it matter to you at all?

Of course, you’re not a talent scout or a fashion photographer.  Don’t make me laugh.  You’re nothing but a mangy dog!  You’re never going to make anyone famous.  All you ever wanted was to take my baby’s clothes off, maybe put her on the streets working for you.

I’m sure it was a thrill raising her hopes, when all the time you knew you were telling her lies.  But I taught her better.  My baby’s beauty is on the inside, as well as the out.

Don’t do this, baby girl.  Please, don’t do this.  He’s not worth the pain he’ll cause you.  And you’re precious.  Remember that.

A 4-part series on absent fathers will begin next week

FOR MORE OF MY ARTICLES ON POVERTY, POLITICS, AND MATTERS OF CONSCIENCE CHECK OUT MY BLOG A LAWYER’S PRAYERS AT: http://www.alawyersprayers.com

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22 Comments

Filed under Christianity, Poverty, Prostitution, Religion, Violence Against Women

22 responses to “Precious

  1. This is sadly beautiful. The way you effortlessly move between the describing the precious beauty of the relationship between the grandmother and grandchild and the harshness of the real struggles of parenting in poverty: loss of parenting, ignorance, aspirations, and the underlying love at the basis of all that is going on is remarkable and touching. A very moving piece, Anna.

  2. How powerful, haunting, and triumphant….you’ve so beautifully conveyed the dark and the light….just so very stirring…thanks so much for sharing your gift (and the heart-bursting image) 🙂

  3. Great work Anna.. You created a touching story from harsh reality..

  4. My goodness, Anna – this goes straight to the heart…

  5. When I read your Story Anna which was well written and very heart touching , I felt forgiveness was needed, it is very important if we are going to be over-comers, not saying we have to be thankful for the evil others have done to us or their words that were like daggers but if we don’t forgive we hurt ourselves even more than those who have hurt us.

    I asked and continue to ask Jesus to help me forgive when needed, it’s why I have His Peace even though my life has been a very hard one, yes I still get upset or respond negatively at times but I do seek to forgive or ask for forgiveness when I have calmed down.

    Christian Love – Anne.

    • You make an important point, Anne. For me, forgiveness has been an ongoing process. Some wounds are very deep. If we continue to carry that bitterness around, it will consume us. Even after we think we have surrendered our anger to the Lord, life events may uncover pockets of pain that are still in need of His healing.

      Forgiveness does not, however, require that we again trust (and make ourselves again vulnerable to) the individual who violated our trust. In situations of domestic abuse, for instance, a wife is not required to return to her husband simply because he promises to “turn over a new leaf”. In fact, she is not required to return, even if he does give indications of having turned over that leaf.

      It is always good to hear from you!

      With love,

      A. ❤

  6. sadly beautiful post, thank you so much for sharing
    kisses

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