Healing from child abuse is possible. But healing is a process [1]. In this regard, healing from domestic abuse is not very different.
Necessary elements include recognizing the full impact of the trauma we experienced; processing the emotions the trauma generated; developing healthy coping mechanisms; and rebuilding a sense of safety and self-worth.
Both healing from child abuse and healing from domestic abuse require courage and patience with ourselves.
The Impact of Trauma
The impact of childhood trauma is multi-faceted. It can range from rage, self-hatred, anxiety, depression, and PTSD (nightmares, flashbacks, emotional detachment, etc.) to sexual addiction, sexual dysfunction, chronic physical ailments (migraines, backaches, etc.), drug or alcohol addiction, and eating disorders [2].
Similarly, domestic violence can result in anxiety, depression, PTSD, and a host of physical ailments from gastrointestinal and cardiovascular issues to traumatic brain injury [3][4].
It bears mention that child abuse and domestic abuse can both result in death, either at the hand of the abuser or by way of suicide years later.
Professional counseling can be of great assistance to survivors in dealing with trauma, re-establishing necessary boundaries, and developing healthy coping skills [5].
Rebuilding Self-Worth
At the deepest level, victims must reclaim a sense of self-worth. This is an enormous challenge. Child victims of abuse are taught from the outset they are dung. Adult victims (having survived turbulent childhoods) are gradually deprived of their power and self-respect by abusive partners.
Supportive relationships can provide connection. Activities in which we take pleasure can bring back our joy. Carrying through with decisions can restore a sense of control to our lives. Achieving professional goals can give us a sense of accomplishment.
But we must first convince ourselves we deserve these things.
Self-compassion is critical. This is more than a matter of positive affirmations or self-care. We must accept that the abuse was not our fault, and place blame where it properly lies without allowing bitterness to consume us.
God’s Love for Abuse Victims
“But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ…” (Eph. 2: 4-5).
God’s love offers victims a firm foundation for healing. The healing He provides is not limited to the body or the mind. It reaches to the very soul.
God changes lives. He enables us to see the world and ourselves differently, whatever the trauma we have endured. In Him, there is always hope.
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[1] Brooklyn College, “Adult Survivors of Child Abuse”, https://www.brooklyn.edu/dosa/health-and-wellness/personal-counseling/loss/child-abuse/.
[2] Charlie Health, “Articles related to trauma”, https://www.charliehealth.com/resources/trauma.
[3] McClean Hospital/Mass General Brigham, “Understanding the Impact of Domestic Violence”, https://www.mcleanhospital.org/essential/domestic-violence.
[4] Southern Valley Alliance, “What Is Domestic Violence?”, https://svamn.org/identify-abuse.
[5] Life Support Counseling, “Adult Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse: It’s Never Too Late to Heal” by Marcus Andrews, https://lifesupportscounselling.com.au/resources/blogs/adult-survivors-of-childhood-sexual-abuse-it-s-never-too-late-to-heal/#:~:text=Establish%20a%20sense%20of%20safety,parents%20and%20other%20family%20members.
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ANNA WALDHERR A Voice Reclaimed, Surviving Child Abuse 
The way you advocate and bring awareness to these issues is always insightful and impactful, Anna. I pray all find comfort and strength in Him, and that you are able to continue speaking for those that cannot. Have a blessed week!
–Scott
Thank you so much, Scott! What a wonderful compliment. May you have a blessed week, also. ❤
I love how you remind us that healing is a process. All too often I fear we are expecting abuse survivors to “get over it already”. That you include God as the foundation for healing is perhaps the most important step in the process.
I cannot speak for all abuse survivors. But I know I often expect myself to “get over it already”. I need the reminder that healing is a process, myself.
This is a wonderful post Anna and it concludes with real solutions, positivity and spirituality
I haven’t mentioned this before but I had been in and out of Psychiatric care myself with low esteem and without purpose
I had been adrift much of my life but had managed to make it through with the help others and their friendship
Oh, Ravishank. I am grieved that you have wrestled w/ self-esteem issues. I would never have guessed.
You are clearly such a worthwhile person. The world would be a poorer place w/o you.
Thank you for sharing your story. And thank you for being who you are. You can be sure that I will pray for you. ❤
This is real affirmation Anna
Thank you so much
I could have only have revealed this on your site on the net
You have suffered so you understand 🙏😌
You yourself are a special person to provide a forum for others to share their life experiences 🙏
Thank you, Ravishank. That is very kind of you. ❤
Anytime Anna 🙏
“Child victims of abuse are taught from the outset they are dung.” 💔 But God is the strong Deliverer. “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ” (Eph. 1:3) We have died with Him and been raised to new life in Him. “The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” (Gal. 2:20) This is the power and love of the living God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Nothing can separate us from His love (Rom. 8) and in Him we are more than conquerors. Hallelujah! God bless and keep you, Anna, in His arms of love.
God bless and keep you, too, Dora. ❤
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keep going and keep growing; rebuilding your self-worth is worth it! sending love and support, Linda xx
Your article is so precisely on point, dear Anna, that I have had the faces of children in front of my memory’s eyes illustrating every word. Of course, we provided extensive therapy, and thank G-d, most of them grew up to become happy individuals, spouses, and parents.
You have done wonderful work, Dolly. That is a tremendous legacy of love. ❤