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There is a secret some victims of childhood sexual abuse will take to their graves, even if they are otherwise able as adults to the discuss the abuse to which they were subjected. This is sexual dysfunction.
Two Types of Scars
Childhood sexual abuse can distort sexual expression in one of two principal ways [1]. Each type of scar negatively impacts victims’ lives.
A. Promiscuity
Many victims will become sexually promiscuous. This demonstrates how little value the abuse taught them they had. The large number of prostitutes who were sexually abused as children illustrate that.
For some of these victims, promiscuous behavior is an attempt to barter for love, since sex is the only medium of exchange they had available. For others, it is an attempt to reclaim ownership of their bodies.
B. Sexual Dysfunction
A smaller percentage of victims will develop sexual dysfunction. This was, in the past, disparagingly termed frigidity, particularly as applied to women [2]. But the problem can afflict both men and women. Desire, arousal, and orgasm can all be impacted.
Sexual dysfunction can range from a decreased interest in sex to the inability to experience sexual pleasure with a partner, pain during intercourse, and outright sexual aversion [3][4][5].
Wherever victims fall in the range, there is great shame associated with the problem.
Stigma
In a sexualized society such as ours, casual sexual encounters are virtually the norm. Promiscuity (whatever its cause) simply fades into the background.
Almost every form of sexual perversion is tolerated. Yet those suffering from sexual dysfunction are likely to be looked on as freaks — ice queens and worse. There is little sympathy extended to them.
This stigma is not, of course, appropriate. We would not shun the victim of a knife attack, or find fault with the scar left by such an attack.
Sexual dysfunction is a legitimate response to trauma. It can be understood as an attempt by victims to distance themselves from their traumatic experience.
Treatment
Sexual dysfunction resulting from childhood sexual abuse can be successfully treated by addressing the underlying psychological problem. Psychiatrist, psychologists, and sex therapists are trained in this area.
Other approaches include hormone therapy, the use of mechanical aids such as vibrators and vaginal dilators, massage, and aroma therapy. If pain is an issue, exploring different sexual positions (for instance, side by side or with the woman above) can be helpful.
Communication between partners is vital. Intimacy is not limited to the physical. It includes emotional connection, genuine friendship, and spiritual union (Eph. 5: 21-33) [6][7].
In the context of a caring relationship, the outlook is good. The past need not cripple the present. Victims need no longer be frozen out of their own lives.
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[1] Childhood sexual abuse can impact gender identification, as well as sexuality. That is a subject worthy of separate discussion.
[2] Sexual dysfunction, it should be noted, can have other causes than child abuse. These include stress, substance abuse, anxiety/depression, heart disease, certain gynecological conditions, and certain medications.
[3] JSC Medical Clinic, “Frigidity in adults” by Vardanyan Gohar, https://en.medicina.ru/for-patients/diseases/frigidity/.
[4] Mayo Clinic, “Female sexual dysfuntion”, 12/17/22, https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/female-sexual-dysfunction/symptoms-causes/syc-20372549.
[5] Cleveland Clinic, “Sexual Dysfunction”, 10/27/20, https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9121-sexual-dysfunction.
[6] Why the Book Wins, “What Does the Bible Say about Lack of Intimacy?” by “Laura”, https://whythebookwins.com/knowledge/what-does-the-bible-say-about-lack-of-intimacy/.
[7] Got Questions, “What is a biblical view of sexuality?”, https://www.gotquestions.org/biblical-sexuality.html.
“Mattress” is the companion piece to this.
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ANNA WALDHERR A Voice Reclaimed, Surviving Child Abuse 
So much pain!!
Liebe Anna, Du hast ein sehr sensibles und viel zu oft tot geschwiegenes Thema aufgegriffen und wie immer fundiert belegt. Es ist einfach furchtbar, wieviel Leid verursacht wird und dass die Opfer ihr Leben lang gezeichnet sind, wenn sie nicht Hilfe erfahren. Alles Liebe, Marie
Vielen Dank, wie immer, für Ihre Sensibilität und Freundlichkeit, Marie. Christus wendet sein Gesicht nicht von diesen vergessenen Opfern ab, wie können wir das also tun? Alles Liebe, A. ❤
These victims certainly need professional help.
Agreed. Because of the secrecy (and shame) surrounding this issue, many are not aware that such help is even available.
I thought so, and you are doing a great job publicizing the issues, dear Anna.
You are so kind, Dolly. ❤
I am nothing but sincere, dear friend.
So very true! I am thankful for a wonderful counselor who had helped me in this area. Helping me to understand my own behavior and healing from the abuse I had lived through. For me it was fear, I had not realized that subconsciously I was willingly sleeping around because I was terrified that it might be taken from me, so to make me think that I was empowered I slept around. Learning the reason behind my behavior helped me and help me get out of victim mentality. Thanks for sharing this post.
There are so many in these shoes, Julie. I am glad you found help. It takes courage to reveal the secret. ❤
Thank you! ❤