Blue Christmas ornament, Author Kristina Servant, Source https://www.flickr.com/photos/xkristinax/8230065092 (CC BY-2.0 Generic)
WARNING: Graphic Images
“I’ll have a blue Christmas without you
I’ll be so blue just thinking about you
Decorations of red on a green Christmas tree
Won’t be the same dear, if you’re not here with me.”– “Blue Christmas”, Elvis Presley
The holidays can be a difficult time for abuse victims, especially those of us suffering from depression. We cannot help but compare the idealized scenes of Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and Diwali festivities with our own childhood experiences.
Even the “best” of holiday gatherings may have been rife with tension. All too often, there was little to be joyful about.
Targets
Children in dysfunctional homes do not receive the care and attention they deserve. Through no fault of their own, they may become the targets of their parents’ rage or neglect.
There are numerous reasons for this [1]. A child may have been the product of an unwanted pregnancy or hard delivery; may seem in some way “abnormal” or resemble someone toward whom the parent has harsh feelings. A parent may actually be jealous of the child. None of these reasons justifies abuse.
Uneven Affection
Affection, if it is given at all, can be unevenly distributed. One child may be showered with gifts and praise, while another is heaped with scorn – made the target of punishment and criticism, with the favored child encouraged to join in. This can warp the relationship between siblings or destroy it outright.
Substance Abuse
Substance abuse only aggravates the situation. Holiday memories pile on holiday memories: Christmas trees toppled; presents non-existent or smashed in anger; an intoxicated parent in a stupor on the lawn, reeking. Continue reading
ANNA WALDHERR A Voice Reclaimed, Surviving Child Abuse 